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Dateable: Are You? Are They? Review
User Submitted Dateable: Are You? Are They? ReviewsNovember 14, 2008 About abstinence, not dating I thought this book had smart ideas like how some people have trained their brain that they must breakup, even when things are going good, they must find something wrong. But it also seemed like the authors were trying to brainwash. My friends were getting mad at me and hiding this book from me. They make ridicuous claims that laying horizontal or having tickle fights are NONOs cuz they can lead to more (sex.) It is made obvious that the authors are christians who do not believe in sex before marriage. THE BOOK WAS ABOUT NOT HAVING SEX BASICALLY. Being dateable had nothing to do with it, except they imply noone wants a used car type of thing. August 1, 2008 Make teenagers read this in high school instead of Shakespeare!! My friend gave me this book to read after both she and her 15 year old son read it. I got through three paragraphs and almost demanded my daughter return home from a date so she could read it. See, my daughter thinks she's going to be with this boy FOREVER, and chapter 1 bluntly states that it's going to end. Thank goodness someone else is telling her and I don't have to be the bad guy. I wish I would have had this book as a teenager. Hayley and Justin are RIGHT. I love the Christian approach, although it's not shoved down teens' throats. It makes the so-called 'lectures' we give as parents a lot more credible when they're in print by two trusted authors. My daughter is already taking a more realistic approach to this relationship. Let's make teens read this instead of Shakespeare!!! July 27, 2008 Dateable: Are you, Are they This book is perfect for those who are of dating age. It makes clear how each gender approaches the other and helps teenagers to find their way through the maze of emotion and hormone-filled pressures with wisdom and purity. I sent one to each of the teenagers in my family. June 27, 2008 Highly Recommended! Great book with valuable information that can save your teen's life! It has made an impact on my teens and their friends as well. May 30, 2008 Wow A a seventeen year old girl struggling to balance relationships and Christianity I found this book EXTREMELY helpful. Justin and Hayley are direct so if that isn't your style or you aren't ready for the truth then this book isn't for you. I have already bought a copy for my bestfriend and lent my copy to one of my other close friends and both of them loved it. I really liked that it is written for boys AND girls and found that they gave a lot of insight into a boys mind. No book is perfect and although I cant say I completely agreed with all their ideas I did find it to be a balanced take on how to be in a relationship as a Christian teenager. I would recomend it to anyone who is seeking the truth about relationships no matter their age! March 29, 2008 Must Read This is absolutely the best book on dating for teens ever written. Justin and Hayley have wonderful advice, great style, and a knack for telling the truth. The book comes from a Christian perspective, yes, but if you (or a teen you love) don't want to just jump into dating and sort out the mess you got into years later, this book is a must read. In three decades of reading and book buying, I've never been more pleased that I stopped grocery shopping and started reading one day. Thanks to the authors so much for caring about teens today enough to tell the truth. I've pushed this on over two dozen girls and guys, and they've all loved it. Only wish you'd written it twenty years ago! January 31, 2008 I LOVE this book i kinda see alot of reveiws from parents so heres mine i read this book when i was 17 i snagged it from my friends backpack while she was taking a nap in study hall waiting or the bell to ring. At the time i had just started my relationship with my current boyfriend and we were in that totally smitten stage where he was perfect in my eyes and he could do kno wrong i swear it was almost sickening. i started reading the book and at first i thought this is terrible! its like theyre basically telling me that its not even gonna be worth spending my time with him cause itll be over soon anyway...i was disgusted YET...i wouldnt turn away. i continued reading and everytime i came to a part where i felt i disagreed with the book, i stopped and actually thought about it in my head to try and see what they were saying and see their point of veiw. an thats when i swear i saw the light! i understood what they were saying. its ok at first to be totally smitten but what we have to realize is that being in a relationship as teenagers we always tend to think 'oh my gosh he/she is perfect' 'he/she will never hurt me or make me cry' yada yada yada and all that good disney channel idea of cutesy love. All this book is doing is trying to show teens that you know what its not always gonna be perfect. there are times when you are gonna get jealous even tho you 'believe' he/she will never put you in that situation. your gonna hurt each other at some point or another or your gonna get irritated with each other and may even get mean (i kno my boyfriend and i really kno just what to say to set the other off). if we as teens are always in the smitten stage of the relationship where we always expect to be lovey dovey all the time we're never gonna grow that thick skin we need in this day and age where lets face it...guys and girls arent exactly what they used to be back in my parents day. the book isnt trying to squash all hopes of being happy its merely stating the truth that things will get hard one day. if the book seems stereotypical about teens today...its cause its all true and this is comming from a teen. but dont take my word for it buy the book if you dont want your kid to grow up to be walked all over by their future partners or become total softees who insist on smothering its not fun trust me. i'm 19 now and i am so glad i came across this book when i did without it i probably would have dumped my boyfriend the first time i realized he had things like a job and school that didnt include lil ol' me :(.... December 30, 2007 Exaggeration: Is it? Yes. Now I'd like to start off by saying that I have not read this whole book. I found it in my 15 year old sister's bedroom, chuckled, picked it up, and read a few pages from various sections. So if you'd like to dismiss my opinion based on that, I don't have to tell you that you have every right to do so. I'm not going to say that you should not buy this book, as much as I believe that these authors need to reeducate themselves before attempting to develop a sequel or any book based on relationships or having to do with "facts" or "reality." However, I must point out that this book is based solely on generalizations and stereotypes among teens today. In some instances, I agree that, sure, something they say may be true more than 50% of the time. But when they stand behind their opinion so strongly to say things like "Don't forget, in the end, no matter how sweet he is, he is male first. And that means he has one goal, and that is the physical pay-off," I can't really stand idly by, being a male myself, and not call that too bold of a statement. Other instances such as "Well, yeah, when the guy says he loves you, he really means it. Seriously. He does. He loves you. And he loves his mom. He loves his car, his dog, and pizza. He loves winning the game," are very common, in which the authors use sarcasm aimed at teens to induce a sense of foolishness. Though this book was written by both a male and female author, it's sole purpose seems to be to strengthen the opinion that all males engage in relationships just for sex. Everything they do is done for themselves. Voicing an opinion is fine, it provides entertainment and useful information for you to use if you ever meet someone who opposes that opinion. In this case, however, the authors go about changing the readers' opinion in a destructive way. It makes girls afraid to date. It attempts to makes teens believe that the relationship they're in doesn't stand a chance by outright saying "Whatever relationship you are in right now, know this: It will not last. Period. The end. I know, you are sooo into this guy or girl - but understand that this relationship will not last. You will break up. It will end." Oh, and that leads me to one of the most interesting parts of the book: "Guys are thoughtful. They put time and effort into finding out what works for them and what doesn't. If what a guy says o you is believable, it's because he has practiced it. He has polished the words to perfection. Question: Where do you think he polished it? On his buds? Uh, that would be no. He fine-tuned his finesse on other girls. He played the game many times before using the exact same lines he's using on you. Yeah, I know, all that's over for him now that he found you. He was clownin' when he was with them, but he finally found you and now he means it. Right. And the tooth fairy left me a dollar last night too." What this book does is attempt to destroy any faith in real feelings. It doesn't even have the decency to use the words "maybe" or "mostly" or "could," just "is" "is" "is." If you're going to buy this book, buy it for entertainment purposes only. There isn't a sentence within its pages that contain an ounce of faith, and without that, they all lead to an untrue, hopeless abyss. December 12, 2007 Passing it on! I purchased this book for my 16 year old daughter. She absolutely loved it and has passed it along to her friends to read. The subject has also become a conversation piece at their lunchroom table. Her comments to me where, "Mom, it makes so much sense...but it is deffinitely advice that girls our age would object to if it came from our parents. Reading about it from two young-adults who have been there and have written it in language we understand has made it easier to listen to." She has been coaching her girlfriends who are in relationships much to serious for their age groups, encouraging them to not put so much of themselves into a teenage relationship. Great advice for boys and girls! Other mothers have even asked me where I purchased it. November 19, 2007 Dateable Wonderful book for teens of all ages. Good to have at any stage of dating. Sometimes hearing it from another source beside a parent - makes it more credible. We used it in a bible study and it was great!! Other girls heard about it and wanted a copy of the book. Older girls in the group were able to share with younger girls their experiences. Very helpful! For more Dateable: Are You? Are They? reviews click here.
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